Mental pictures .

I feel very much deserted , left alone in thought which brings me to much depression . Its difficult being the one who people mostly depend on for help though it might sound like a burden , its not . I definitely enjoy helping others but then at the same time , there are these piles of problems of my own that were left untouched , unsolved and dusty at the back of my mind . Who is to help me then ? I am currently overwhelmed by these waves of emotions that are hardly ever stable . I might be just another teenager thinking that I'm going through a crisis , but I'm not . My life's story is much more complicated than it may seem . I do not uncover many things of my life to my friends because I am either ashamed or just plain ignorant towards these tragedies . I lay down on my bed every single night , trying to fall asleep , thinking about how things could have been . I keep having these flashes of moments in my life where I always wished I could re-do . But then I thought , what would I be today without those embarrassing moments or sad moments ? I would be different . Bad or good thing ? I wouldn't know . I should really learn how to let go on certain things and relax my mind . People keep saying I over think everything . I don't see how that I wrong . I think of it as a good thing sometimes . No matter how hard I try to erase a bad memory , my DELETE button in my brain never seems to work . Temporary memory loss , yes . Though it may not last long , its good enough for me . Some peace of mind once in awhile is good . I can't help but pause for a few seconds of my everyday and think about things that make me want to cry . Its rather depressing . I try very hard to hide my emotions when I'm with people because people these days tend to be very judgmental of the most slightest things . We must be careful . Life is a full of a lifetimes worth of lessons . So make the most of it .